


Secret Santa

by PhoenixAD



Category: Chicago Fire
Genre: Christmas, F/M, Secret Santa
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-18
Updated: 2020-12-18
Packaged: 2021-03-10 18:54:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,486
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28141956
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PhoenixAD/pseuds/PhoenixAD
Summary: Santa, tell me if he really cares, cause I can't give it all away if he won't be here next year.Oh, I wanna have him beside me on the 25th by the fire place, but I don't want a new broken heart.Santa, Tell Me - Ariana Grande
Relationships: Sylvie Brett & Matthew Casey, Sylvie Brett/Matthew Casey
Comments: 27
Kudos: 113





	Secret Santa

**Author's Note:**

> _Santa, tell me if he really cares, cause I can't give it all away if he won't be here next year._   
>  _Oh, I wanna have him beside me on the 25th by the fire place, but I don't want a new broken heart._
> 
> Santa, Tell Me - Ariana Grande

Sylvie Brett sat up with a sigh, staring at the Christmas tree in the corner of her bedroom; she had a bigger tree in her living room, but she’d put the small one on her dresser in the hopes it would help get her into the Christmas spirit. It hadn’t worked. 

The sun wasn’t fully up yet, but Sylvie had been awake for over an hour; throwing her blankets aside in frustration, she decided to go for a run before shift. 

Within five minutes, Sylvie was dressed in her warmest running gear and out her door, earbuds in as she selected her favorite Christmas playlist. 

Sylvie wasn’t paying much attention to her route, glancing in the windows of all the shops she passed at their Christmas displays. 

It wasn’t until she could see Molly’s in the distance that she realized how far she had run - or even which direction. 

Sighing as she pulled her earbuds out to pause and catch her breath, Sylvie looked up at the bar that, until the past month, she’d spent most of her free nights at; she hadn’t been able to bring herself to step foot inside since that night with Matt. 

She wasn’t just avoiding Molly’s because she was avoiding Matt, although she knew everybody assumed that was why since she was avoiding him at work; Molly’s held too many memories of nights spent talking and laughing with Matt. 

Sylvie hadn’t shown up at Molly’s since the night after the Ambo crash, and she’d only stayed long enough to hear Gallo’s account of Matt’s heroics at the scene before fleeing. 

“What are you doing here, kid?” Herrmann opened the door to Molly’s, stepping out. 

“Oh, I, uh, went for a run and kinda didn’t realize how long I’d been running until I got here.” Sylvie admitted. 

Herrmann checked his watch as he locked the door behind him. “Well, come on then. I’ll drop you at your apartment. No way you’ll have time to run home and then get to the house before shift otherwise.” 

“Thank you, Herrmann.” Sylvie sighed. “That would be great.” 

“No problem.” Herrmann laughed as Sylvie opened the passenger side door to his minivan. 

“What are you doing at Molly’s so early?” Sylvie asked as he handed her a water bottle from the cup holder. 

“Had to sign for a delivery.” Herrmann replied. 

“Oh.” Sylvie nodded. 

After a few minutes of silence, Herrmann broke it. “Where you been lately? I haven’t seen you around Molly’s.” 

“Just...” Sylvie turned to look out the window. “Haven’t felt like being around people too much lately, I guess.” 

“People?” He asked. “Or maybe one specific person, like oh, I don’t know... the Captain?” 

Sylvie sighed. “That obvious, huh?” 

“Well, kind of, yeah. It’d be hard not to notice.” He paused. “My unsolicited advice, not knowing anything about the situation, is the guy is obviously miserable and clearly wants to talk to you, if you’d stop running away from him, and since you already seem pretty miserable, I don’t see what you’ve got to lose.” 

Sylvie was miserable, but she knew she could be worse; hearing Matt talk about still being in love with Gabby? That wasn’t something she thought she could handle. 

“It’s not that simple.” 

“If you say so.” Herrmann shrugged as they pulled up in front of her building. 

“Thanks for the ride, Herrmann.” 

“No problem, kid.” Herrmann smiled. “See you at the house.” 

“See you there.” 

* * *

“Hey, you seen Brett yet?” Stella leaned in Matt’s doorway, checking her watch. 

“No.” Matt sighed. “Why?” 

“Because I haven’t seen her yet, and she never cuts it this close.” 

“Did you try texting or calling her?” Matt glanced at his phone, but he knew if she wasn’t answering Stella, she definitely wouldn’t answer him. 

“I texted, no response yet.” 

“She’s probably just driving and running late.” 

“Yeah, probably.” Stella sighed. “Have you talked to her at all in the last month?”

“In passing, here.” Matt kept his tone light, as if the fact he hadn’t had an actual conversation with her in almost a month and a half wasn’t driving him crazy. 

Stella sighed, crossing her arms over her chest. “You need to fix this.” 

“I can’t if she won’t talk to me.” Matt sighed. “And she’s made it really clear she doesn’t want to talk to me.” 

“Then try harder, Matt. This is Sylvie we’re talking about. Make an effort and you know she’ll hear you out.” 

“I don’t have time for this right now,  _ Kidd. _ ” Matt’s emphasis on her last night reminded her she was at work, and here, he was her boss, not her friend and roommate.

“Right, sorry, Captain.” Stella nodded. “If Sylvie ends up being late, I can fill in on Ambo if necessary.” 

Matt checked the time on his phone. “She’s still got five minutes, but okay.” 

* * *

“Cutting it close there, Brett.” Cruz exclaimed as Sylvie rushed through the common room.

“I know, I know.” Sylvie kept rushing towards the locker room. 

Matt stood up as he saw Sylvie rushing by. “Everything okay?”

“Everything’s fine, Captain.” Sylvie kept her head down until she made it to her locker, then sighed, leaning against it as she checked her watch; she was exactly on time. 

“Brett! We’re decorating the tree, want to help?” Gianna asked, lugging a box of tree decorations with Gallo behind her with another box. 

“I don’t think so.” Sylvie shook her head. 

“Seriously?” Gallo asked. “Last year you were all over the decorations.”

“Just not feeling it this year, I guess.” Sylvie smiled, waiting for them to walk away to let it fade. 

Christmas had always been Sylvie’s favorite holiday. She loved Christmas; finding the perfect gifts for everybody she loved, the time with friends and family, the music, the decorations, everything about it. 

_ Most  _ years. 

This year, she just didn’t have it in her to be enthusiastic; between her broken heart and the absolute disaster this year had been, for her personally and the world as a whole, she was just too tired to care. 

“There you are!” Stella exclaimed as Sylvie walked into the bunk room. “You good?” 

“Yeah, just went for a run this morning and lost track of time.” Sylvie shrugged. 

“Okay.” Stella eyed her best friend suspiciously. “I was waiting for you to bring up this year’s Secret Santa, but since it’s a week and a half away... do you want me to take over organizing it?” 

“Yeah, that’s fine.” Sylvie flopped down on her bunk. “I’m not feeling it this year.” 

“Clearly.” Stella sighed. “I’m worried about you, girl. You haven’t been yourself.” 

“I’m fine, Stella.” 

“I know you’re upset about what happened with Matt.” Stella lowered her voice so she wouldn’t be overheard. “But I’ve seen you go through heartbreak before and I’ve never seen you this... low before.” 

Sylvie laughed, but it was humorless, bitter. “If those were heartbreaks, I don’t even know what this is.” 

“Oh, honey.” Stella sighed, sitting on the edge of Sylvie’s bed, forcing Sylvie to scoot over. “I’m sorry. If you want to talk about it, we can go to Severide’s quarters for privacy. He’s out running drills with his guys. Even if he wasn’t, I’d kick him out.”

“No, I really don’t.” Sylvie shook her head. “I will not cry at work. Again. Thank you, though.” 

“If you change your mind, the offer stands, okay?” Stella stood up. “I love you.” 

“Love you too.” Sylvie sighed, sitting up. “Probably time for morning brief, I suppose.” 

* * *

Sylvie was only half paying attention to the Chief’s morning announcements, which was not typical for her, but she couldn’t seem to bring herself to focus. 

“This year’s Secret Santa is being organized by Stella Kidd, so she will do the name draw later today.” At Chief’s words, Sylvie could feel eyes on her; everybody knew Sylvie always organized Secret Santa. “If you have questions, direct them to Kidd.” 

As soon as Boden dismissed them, Sylvie bolted for the side door, knowing Matt would be standing against the back wall, as always. 

“Mackey, let’s do inventory.” 

“Okay.” Gianna followed behind her. “So you guys do Secret Santa every year?” 

“Yeah.” Sylvie nodded. “We kind of make a game of it, like you have to guess who your secret Santa is.”

“Sounds fun.” Gianna remarked. 

“It is.” Sylvie climbed on the back of 61 to start inventory. 

“What’s on your wish list this year?” 

“I don’t really have one.” Not anything anybody could buy her, anyway; nobody could buy her a way out of this heartbreak. 

* * *

They hadn’t been working for more than ten minutes when Stella barged out on the apparatus floor. “Time for the Secret Santa name draw!” 

“Yeah, coming.” Sylvie sighed, jumping down. 

Sylvie trailed behind Gianna and Stella towards the common room, her eyes automatically scanning the room for Matt, but she saw no sign of him yet. 

Sylvie took the spot on the couch next to Tuesday, the safest way to guarantee she wouldn’t end up sitting next to Matt; nobody tried to get Mouch or Tuesday to give up their spots.

“Where’s Casey?” Stella asked Kelly as he entered the common room, receiving a shrug in response. “Okay, be back momentarily with the Captain and then we can start.”

“Hey Brett.” Cruz sat on the arm of the couch next to her. “You okay? You always organize Secret Santa.” 

Sylvie was getting very tired of being asked if she was okay; she knew her friends all meant well, but it was exhausting. “Yeah, I’m fine. Just didn’t feel like it this year.” 

Cruz squeezed her shoulder, standing up. “Okay. If there’s more to it and you want to talk about, you know I’m around.” 

“Thank you, Joe, but I’m fine.” Sylvie faked a smile; he walked away, leaving her time to think. 

Sylvie had a general idea of what she’d get whoever’s name she got; most of them were fairly easy to shop for. She already had gifts for a few of them, gifts not meant for the Secret Santa exchange. 

“Okay, let’s get this thing started.” Stella announced as she practically dragged Matt into the room; he leaned against the wall, trying not to focus all of his attention on Sylvie. “We all know the rules. Draw a name, if it’s your own, put it back and draw again, and don’t let anybody else know who you got. Now, who wants to draw first?” 

Sylvie raised her hand; she just wanted to get it over with, but she hoped it would appear as enthusiasm to placate her friends. “I’ll go.” 

Sylvie walked over to Stella, who held out the helmet full of names to her; Sylvie grabbed the first piece of paper that her fingers touched and pulled it out, unfolding it to see who’s name she got. 

Sylvie plastered on a smile as she quickly folded the paper back up and shoved it in her pocket. 

“Who’s next?” Stella asked.

Sylvie didn’t stick around to find out, heading out towards Ambo, sitting on the back bumper and pulled the piece of paper back out to stare at it. 

_ Matt Casey. _

* * *

“Hey.” Matt stepped into Kelly’s quarters, taking a seat in the empty chair. “Who’d you get for the Secret Santa?” 

“I think the point of Secret Santa is that it stays, well, a secret.” Kelly laughed. “Why?” 

“I’m trying to figure out who got Sylvie so I can switch with them.” 

Kelly raised an eyebrow. “You do know buying her some gift will not make her magically forgive you, right?” 

“Obviously.” Matt rolled his eyes. “But I already have a gift for her and I’d just give it to her anyways, but she literally runs away from me, so...” 

“You know, if someone had told me a few years ago that one day I’d be the one in a stable relationship while you were involved in a volatile firehouse romance, I don’t think I would’ve believed them.”

“Volatile might be an exaggeration.” Matt retorted. 

“Volatile, meaning threatening to explode.” Kelly opened his desk drawer. “Sounds about accurate to me. Here.” 

Kelly handed him the paper with Sylvie’s name on it. 

“That works out well since I got Stella.” Matt laughed, handing him his paper. “Thanks.” 

* * *

Matt Casey was not an easy man to shop for, Sylvie knew this well, and that’s why she had started looking for a Christmas gift before Halloween had even happened; he wasn’t a materialistic man. Function and practicality over style or frivolous. 

She’d ordered his gift before everything changed, and she’d been unsure what she was going to do with it until she’d drawn his name for Secret Santa, so by Christmas Eve, the day of their exchange, she was glad she’d gotten his name; she could give it to him and wave it off as Secret Santa, not something she’d bought months ago and put a fair amount of thought into. 

“Merry Christmas!” Gianna exclaimed as soon as Sylvie stepped out of her car in front of 51; she was wearing a Santa hat on her head and a big smile on her face. “I love Christmas.” 

“I can tell.” Sylvie laughed. 

“Hey Brett.” Stella jogged up towards them as they approached the firehouse. “I need a favor.” 

“What’s that?” Sylvie asked; Gianna kept walking towards the house, leaving the two of them alone. 

“I was hoping you’d be free on Tuesday to help with Girls on Fire?” 

“Yeah, sure.” Sylvie smiled. “No problem.” 

“Great! Thank you!” Stella smiled. “Oh, hi Captain.” 

Sylvie tensed as Stella greeted Matt, who stopped right next to her. 

“Hey.” Matt smiled. “Merry Christmas.” 

“Hi.” Sylvie glanced away. “Merry Christmas.” 

Stella hurried off to check something on the truck, leaving Sylvie glaring at her retreating form as she stood next to Matt. 

“Sylvie.” Matt sighed. “We have to talk about what happened, eventually.” 

“Yeah, I know.” Sylvie knew. She just hoped some time in the foreseeable future she’d be able to see him without wanting to burst into tears or wanting to bury her head in embarrassment. “I know.” 

“I respect that you need time, but it’s been over a month and a half.” Matt sighed. “And I hate this. I miss you.” 

Sylvie tried to ignore the pang of pain she swore she could  _ physically  _ feel in her chest and picked up her pace, trying to get inside where she knew Matt would drop the topic. 

“Hey, you’re under the mistletoe!” Cruz exclaimed as they walked into the common room.

Sylvie paused her step, mentally cursing herself for forgetting that it was hanging there and letting herself walk through the entryway with Matt. 

Cruz’s eyes widened as both Sylvie and Matt shot him glares, and he picked up his newspaper, hiding his face behind it. 

“Candidate, take that crap down.” Matt snapped. “This is a workplace, for God’s sake.” 

Sylvie let out a sigh of relief as Matt turned and walked away in the other direction, and Gallo jumped up to remove the mistletoe as ordered. 

“Hey.” Cruz grabbed her arm as she walked past. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to... make things awkward or anything.” 

“It’s fine.” She hadn’t told Cruz anything about what had happened with Matt; he had no reason to assume it would’ve been any weirder than the other day when she’d accidentally walked under it with Kelly, who’d kissed her cheek, and that was that. “No big deal.” 

Matt was already in his quarters when Sylvie walked past, then stopped with a sigh, turning around. 

“Thanks for that.” 

Matt looked up in surprise at the sound of Sylvie’s voice. “Are you kidding? I’ve been ready for that stuff to go since I accidentally walked through with Herrmann and he kissed my cheek. That was my least favorite part of last week, and I almost fell to my death off the aerial.” 

Sylvie’s laugh put the first genuine smile on Matt’s face in weeks. “Mistletoe in 2020 seems like a bad idea, anyway.” 

“It really does.” 

“I... better go change before bells.” Sylvie gripped the strap of her bag tighter, hesitating. “And for the record, I miss you too. You’re one of my best friends, Matt. I know we’ll get back to the way it was one day, but for now... I’m sorry but I’m not there yet.” 

Sylvie hurried off, and Matt forced himself to remain in his chair; he wasn’t going to chase after her and try to force her to talk to him at work, no matter how much he wanted to. 

* * *

“Here, I made you a peppermint hot coco.” Stella handed Sylvie the mug as she sat down on the edge of her bunk. 

“Thank you.” Sylvie smiled. 

“So what are your Christmas plans for tomorrow?” 

“Curling up on my couch and watching Love Actually, probably.” Sylvie sighed. “A lot of wine.” 

“Yeah, that sounds healthy.” Stella nodded. “It’s not like you cry at that movie on a good day or anything.” 

“It’s not like I can go home to my family.” Sylvie shrugged. “What about you?” 

“Kelly and I are heading out to the cabin.” Stella answered. “You could come too. There’s an extra bedroom.” 

“Thanks for the offer, but god, no.” Sylvie shook her head. “No offense because I love you dearly and wish you absolutely nothing but happiness, but the idea of spending two days in a cabin with two people in love makes me want to bang my head into a wall.” 

“Okay, fair enough.” Stella chuckled. “Well, come on then, it’s almost time for Secret Santa.” 

Sylvie glanced at her watch, surprised by how late it had gotten, then nodded. “Okay.” 

“So who did you get for this thing?” Stella asked in a whisper. 

Sylvie laughed. “It’s supposed to be a secret, Stella.” 

* * *

Matt was barely paying attention to the gift exchange going on between his friends, his focus on Sylvie; she was sitting at the other end of the table, a smile plastered on her face he knew wasn’t real. 

When Sylvie smiled, really, genuinely smiled, her entire face lit up and you could tell she was smiling, even if she was hiding her mouth; these smiles were Matt’s favorite thing to see, but he knew the smile on her face as she sat there, sipping at her hot coco and watching her friends, wasn’t one of them. He hated that she was sad, especially at this time of year when she usually loved Christmas, but he hated even more that he was likely the reason. 

Matt had been so distracted watching Sylvie, he hadn’t even noticed Stella saying his name until Sylvie’s eyes flickered over to him, looking expectant. 

“Casey.” Stella repeated, setting his present down on the table in front of him. “Your turn.” 

Matt took one look at the box in front of him and knew who it was from; the wrapping paper with penguins wearing Santa hats, the fact that it was perfectly wrapped, it all screamed Sylvie Brett. 

“I’m going to take a guess here and assume this is from Brett, since nobody else in this house would wrap something so neatly.” Matt laughed. 

Sylvie nodded and looked down at her mug as Matt started unwrapping the gift; once he got it unwrapped, he picked up the wooden box, running his hand over his last name, engraved on the top. 

It wasn’t until he lifted the lid he realized it was a humidor for his cigars, and inside was a torch lighter, a cigar cutter, and a travel case, each monogrammed with his initials. 

“Thank you, Sylvie.” Matt smiled. “Really, this is great.” 

“A hell of a lot nicer than the one you have.” Kelly quipped. 

Sylvie shrugged. “Glad you like it.” 

* * *

Sylvie had brushed it off as nothing, but she couldn’t help but feel a little self-satisfied that Matt seemed to genuinely like his gift; she’d watched him open gifts for years in the past, and she’d always been able to tell when he didn’t care much for them. 

“Sylvie, this is yours.” Stella handed her the box. 

Sylvie plastered a smile on her face as she grabbed the package, carefully pulling back the white and red gift wrap. 

She knew instantly who it was from when she saw the dancing hula shark; there was only one person who would know how much her silly little dashboard doll had meant to her, even if she hadn’t told him. Sylvie knew it was Matt before she even picked up the small stock card and recognized his handwriting. 

_ I know it can’t replace the original because it was a gift from Pete, but I thought you might want to keep the memory of Sharky alive with Sharky the Second.  _

Sylvie smiled, ignoring the sting in her eyes of the tears that were threatening to form, and looked up to meet Matt’s eyes. 

“Thank you.” Her voice was barely above a whisper. “I love it.” 

Matt smiled, and Sylvie was aware of their friends glancing between them, but she paid little attention until Stella cleared her throat, and moved on to the next gift. 

* * *

Sylvie was laying in her bunk, staring at Sharky the Second, sitting on her nightstand. It was almost the end of shift and she hadn’t put it on Ambo yet, but she had spent half the night laying on her side, staring at it. 

How did he know a cheesy novelty item mean so much to her without her ever having said anything? She’d been sad when it hadn’t survived the Ambo crash, but she’d certainly said nothing about it. 

Sighing, Sylvie rolled over onto her back, opting to stare at the ceiling instead as she heard everybody else gathering their stuff, all eager to get home on Christmas Day as soon as shift ended. 

“Hey partner.” Gianna stopped by the foot of her bed. “Merry Christmas.” 

“Merry Christmas, Gianna.” Sylvie’s smile was slightly less forced than the one she’d given her the morning before. “What are your plans for the day?” 

“Dinner with my parents.” Gianna smiled. “Usually we have the entire family, but with COVID... what about you? Any plans?” 

“My family’s out of state, so no.” Sylvie shook her head, forcing herself to sit up. 

“You know, my parents would love to meet you if you wanted to come to dinner.” Gianna offered. 

“Oh, thank you, Gianna, but I don’t think I’m going to be up for it.” Sylvie smiled. “I barely slept last night, even between calls.” 

“Okay, just throwing the offer out there. If you change your mind, just text me.” 

Sylvie smiled and nodded, knowing she wouldn’t change her mind. “Thanks.” 

Gianna walked towards the locker room, and Sylvie reluctantly climbed off the bed, knowing shift was officially over and the next shift’s crew was arriving. 

After changing and throwing her stuff in her duffel bag, Sylvie went back to her bunk, grabbing Sharky the Second; she glanced towards Matt’s quarters, but she could see he was on the phone. 

It was for the best, she decided; she knew they needed to talk, but it wasn’t the place.

* * *

Sylvie wasn’t sure what she was doing there, even as she rang the bell to the apartment Matt shared with Kelly and Stella; she’d told herself she was coming to talk to him, but she wasn’t sure about what she even wanted to say. 

When there was no answer at the door, Sylvie sighed; it was Christmas Day, he could’ve had plans. She hadn’t spoken to him to ask about his plans, but she knew he had a sister and niece. 

Sylvie leaned her back against the wall and slid down until she was sitting on the ground, pulling Sharky the Second out of her bag; she’d been sitting in her apartment with a glass of wine, looking at it, when she’d decided she’d just come and talk to him. 

Was she going to sit outside his apartment door and wait for him? Sylvie groaned at her own behavior. He could be gone for hours, for all she knew. Then again, she could probably use the time to untangle the mess of emotions she had going on. 

“Are you okay, Miss?” An older woman walking out of the apartment next door asked. 

“Oh, yeah.” Sylvie smiled. “I’m just waiting for my friend to get home.” 

“Well, if you’re waiting for Kelly or Stella, you’re going to be waiting a while. Looked like they were heading out of town last I saw.” She remarked. 

“I know they did.” Sylvie nodded. “I’m waiting for Matt.” 

The woman nodded and smiled as she walked past her towards the stairs, and Sylvie sighed once she was out of sight. 

* * *

_ There’s a young woman sitting outside your apartment door.  _

To say the text from his nosy but always well-meaning neighbor had confused Matt would be an understatement; he’d quickly made an excuse to slip away from his sister’s house and headed home. 

Matt took the stairs two at a time once he was inside the building, stopping in his tracks when he saw Sylvie sitting on the ground, back against the wall. 

“Sylvie.” Matt watched her head jerk towards him. “What are you doing here? Are you okay?”

“Yeah, I’m fine.” Sylvie stood up, brushing her legs off on instinct. “I wanted to talk.” 

“Why didn’t you call me?” Matt asked as he unlocked the door. 

“I don’t know.” Sylvie admitted, following him inside. 

“Getting a text from Mrs. Baker about somebody sitting outside my apartment was a little alarming.” Matt chuckled. “Do you want a beer? Or coffee?”

“Um, a beer sounds good.” Sylvie replied. “I hope you didn’t rush here and ruin your Christmas plans. I really didn’t mean -”

“Believe me, I’d rather be here than sitting through a Vegan dinner with my sister and her new boyfriend.” Matt waved off her concern as he opened two beers from the fridge. “My niece was with her dad anyway, and I’m not a fan of the boyfriend.” 

“Thanks.” Sylvie mumbled as she accepted the beer he held out to her. 

“Yesterday you said you weren’t ready to talk.” Matt set his untouched beer down on the counter. “What changed?” 

Sylvie grabbed her Christmas gift out of her bag and set it on the counter. “This. How did you know this stupid piece of plastic meant so much to me?”

“Because I know you, Sylvie.” Matt watched her face for a reaction, but she was keeping her expression as neutral as possible. “You said I’m one of your best friends, but you’re one of mine too.” 

Sylvie sighed, pushing her hair out of her face. “I know.” 

“Look, Sylvie.” Matt sighed. “You said we’d get back to the way it was, but what if I don’t want to go back to that?” 

“I don’t see another option, Matt.” Sylvie sat down in one of the barstools. “I... can’t. I can’t be with you and spend my life wondering if you’d choose her if she came back, or if I’m some kind of back-up plan you’re settling for.” 

“A back-up plan implies any of this was something I planned for.” Matt shook his head. “I didn’t plan on any of this. Jesus, when Gabby left, I didn’t think I’d ever move on, much less that her best friend would be the one that helped me do it.” 

“I know you didn’t plan on any of this, but it doesn’t mean I’m not a second choice, and I won’t do that to myself.” Sylvie closed her eyes, willing the tears away. 

Matt wanted to walk around the counter and hug her; it went against every instinct in his body not to comfort her, but he knew she didn’t want him to. 

“Sylvie, I don’t know how to make you realize you aren’t a second choice.” Matt sighed. “You’re not. Just because it’s happening after Gabby doesn’t make you second.” 

“I know part of this is me, okay? I know some of this is my insecurities. When I first got to 51, it felt like I was walking in Shay’s shadow. It didn’t help that I look just enough like her to remind Severide of the best friend he lost.” Sylvie sighed, staring at the countertop instead of looking up. “And then Gabby left, and I... somehow ended up feeling like I’m walking in her shadow now.” 

“Gabby’s a part of my past, and I can’t change that, and I don’t want to. She was important to me. I love her and I always will, but she is my past, and I don’t want to change that either. I want to move forward, and when I picture my future, it’s not her I see, it’s you.” 

Sylvie looked up hesitantly, finding him staring at her, but said nothing. 

“Sylvie, you’re not a consolation prize.” Matt promised. “And I know my reaction to your question that night might’ve made that hard to believe, but I was just... I don’t know. I wasn’t thinking straight.” 

Sylvie wiped at her eyes, mentally scolding herself for breaking her promise not to cry. “It was a pretty simple question.”

“For a really not simple situation.” Matt sighed. “I regretted it as soon as I said it, and then you asked me to leave, and it’s not like I was going to push you to let me stay and talk it out.” 

“If we go down this road and it doesn’t work out, Matt... I don’t know how I could handle it. This past month and a half has been hard enough.” Sylvie admitted.

“I know. And I get it, if you don’t want to take that risk. I’d rather have you as my friend than how it’s been since that night. I want you in my life, however I can.” Matt risked stepping closer, waiting to see how she reacted before getting any closer. “You know I can’t promise that it would work out if we tried this. If there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s that there are no guarantees in this life.” 

“I know there’s not.” Sylvie sighed as Matt stepped close enough to reach around her to the back of her barstool, turning it to face him. 

“But I can promise that I’m not still in love with Gabby or hung up on her at all.” Matt promised. “The only person I want to be with is you, Sylvie.” 

Sylvie looked at him, searching for any sign of doubt or hesitation, but she couldn’t find anything other than honesty in his eyes. “I believe you.” 

“You believe me... means what for us, exactly?” Matt asked. 

Sylvie beamed, the kind of genuine smile that he had spent the past month missing, before throwing her arms around his neck, pressing her lips to his; the suddenness of her actions surprised him, but it only took a few seconds before the shock wore off and he wrapped his arms around her. 

“It means I don’t want to go back to being just your friend either.” Sylvie whispered with a grin. 

* * *

“This really isn’t how I imagined spending Christmas.” Matt laughed as he moved the take-out containers off the bed and sat them on the nightstand. “At all.” 

They were sitting on his bed; Sylvie had one of his Captain’s polos on, a sight Matt liked more than he cared to admit. 

“It’s a Christmas miracle.” Sylvie quipped with a grin. 

Matt laughed. “Well, you might be right. How else does a Secret Santa gift get us here?” 

“Especially when I was dreading it, and Christmas in general this year.” Sylvie laughed. 

“Yeah, I’m sorry if me being an idiot was why.” Matt felt Sylvie lacing her fingers through his and smiled down at their interlocked hands. 

“Well, if I hadn’t avoided you for over a month, maybe this could have been sorted out weeks ago, so it’s on both of us.” Sylvie smiled. “It doesn’t matter. We’re here now. No matter how unexpectedly it happened.” 

“I think it’s kind of fitting, that it was unexpected.” Matt smiled. “God knows everything else about this has been. I never saw any of this coming.” 

“I know.” Sylvie touched the side of his face, pulling his head down to kiss him. “I didn’t either, but I’m so glad it did.” 

* * *

“What is that?” Stella exclaimed as Sylvie approached 51, the first shift after Christmas. “An actual smile? Does this mean my best friend is back to her normal self again?”

Sylvie laughed. “I guess so.” 

Truthfully, Sylvie’s cheeks almost hurt from how much she’d been smiling. 

“Glad to hear it.” Stella smiled. “I fully expect to hear what changed later.” 

“Yeah, okay.” Sylvie laughed, climbing into 61 to place Sharky the Second on the dash. 

Gianna laughed as she walked up. “Is the dancing hula shark some kind of inside joke I don’t understand?”

“Something like that.” Sylvie smiled as she climbed out of the ambulance. “I’m going to get some coffee.” 

Sylvie walked in the common room, her eyes immediately landing on Matt in the kitchen; she’d seen him less than twelve hours before when she’d left his apartment, right before Stella and Kelly had been expected to come home, yet she’d missed him. 

“Good morning, Brett.” Matt smirked. 

“Good morning, Captain.” Sylvie poured herself a mug of coffee. “Did you have a good Christmas?” 

“I did.” Matt replied. “What about you?”

“Yeah, I did too. It was pretty great.” 

“Glad to hear it.” Matt smiled. “Well, I’ve got paperwork to catch up on, better get to it.” 

Sylvie forced herself not to watch him walk away and turned towards the tables, finding Herrmann watching her. 

“So should I expect to see you at Molly’s after shift?” Herrmann asked. 

“Yeah, I think so.” 

“Good.” Herrmann picked up his mug. “We’ve missed you. Glad to see you back to your cheery self.” 

Sylvie walked into the bunk room; Matt’s quarters had the blinds drawn, and the door was closed, but she knocked on the door, anyway. 

“It’s open.” Matt answered; Sylvie stepped inside, closing the door behind her. “Lock the door.” 

“Captain!” Sylvie gasped as if she was scandalized, reaching behind her to lock the door before crossing the small space to his bed. “Are you suggesting what I think you’re suggesting?” 

Matt raised an eyebrow as Sylvie crawled into the bed with him. “With how loud you are? It’s probably a bad idea.” 

Sylvie smacked his arm, smirking. “Oh, I’m perfectly capable of being quiet, Captain. Are you?” 

“As much as I’m up for that challenge, maybe not while everybody’s up and around.” Matt laughed, leaning over to kiss her. 

“Fair enough.” Sylvie smiled. “So, I told Herrmann I’d come by Molly’s after shift since I’ve been avoiding it for so long.” 

“Okay.” Matt wrapped his arm around her waist. “Everybody’s missed you there.” 

“Do you want to meet me there?” Sylvie asked. 

“Or we could go together.” Matt suggested. 

“You sure?” Sylvie turned her head to look at him. 

“I’ve got no interest in keeping this a secret, Sylvie.” Matt smiled. “If you don’t want everybody to know yet, that’s fine, we can wait, but that’s up to you.” 

“Well, I am pretty terrible at secret keeping.” Sylvie laughed. “So I say going together sounds pretty great.” 

“Okay.” Matt agreed as Sylvie climbed off the bed. “Where are you going?” 

“We’re at work, Captain.” Sylvie smirked. “I’ve got work to do.” 

* * *

“Wait!” Sylvie stopped suddenly outside of Molly’s; their interlocked hands meant Matt stopped almost as suddenly. “Should we have told the Chief first? He finds out the Captain and PIC are involved through gossip, he might not love that.” 

“Which is why I talked to Boden before I left the house this morning. It’s fine.” Matt laughed. “We don’t have to do this yet, you know.” 

Sylvie smiled. “No, I just wanted to make sure we weren’t going to piss Boden off.” 

Matt opened the door, letting Sylvie walk in first; Stella was the only one inside, her back to them as she reached for a bottle off the shelf. 

“Hey Stella.” Sylvie greeted her. 

“Hey!” Stella, shocked to hear Sylvie’s voice in the bar, turned around, her eyes immediately going to their hands. “Oh! I knew it! I told Kelly that’s why you never came home after shift!” 

“Guilty.” Matt laughed. 

“That’s great. I’m happy for both of you. Took you long enough.” Stella laughed. “And we are having a girls’ night soon to gossip, got it?”

“Got it.” Sylvie laughed as Matt led her towards the patio. 

“Hey stranger!” Herrmann’s greeting drew plenty of eyes towards them, but nobody seemed particularly surprised to see Matt and Sylvie holding hands. “It’s good to have you back.” 

“Thanks, Herrmann.” Sylvie smiled. 

Kelly smirked at them as they approached his table. “Damn, Stella was right.” 

“She usually is.” Sylvie laughed as she sat down. “You should know that by now.” 

“True.” Kelly laughed. “What are you drinking? First round’s on me.” 

“Oh, okay. I’ll have a Rosé, I guess.” 

“I’ll -”

“Yeah, I know what you drink, man. Same beer every time.” Kelly cut him off as he stood up. 

Sylvie glanced around the patio at all of her friends; everybody had gone about their conversations, and nobody seemed to be whispering about them, so she was relieved. 

Sylvie leaned closer to whisper to Matt. “I think we might have been the only ones that didn’t see this coming.” 

Matt chuckled. “Sounds about right.” 

* * *

Sylvie was leaning against the bar, talking to Cruz, when she felt arms snake around her waist from behind her; she smiled, leaning her back against Matt’s chest. “We were just talking about you.” 

“Oh?” Matt kissed her shoulder. 

“Well, we were talking about a double date.” Cruz laughed. 

“Or maybe a game night.” Sylvie laughed. 

“Sounds like fun.” Matt agreed. “You ready to get out of here?” 

Sylvie glanced around the patio; she’d made the rounds and talked to all of her friends she’d isolated herself from. 

“Yeah, I’m ready.” Sylvie agreed. “Joe, text me or have Chloe text me about game night, okay?” 

“Okay.” Cruz laughed. “You two have a good night.” 

“We will.” Matt laughed, taking Sylvie’s hand and leading her into the bar. “Night, Stella.” 

“I’m guessing we shouldn’t expect to see you around the apartment tonight or tomorrow?” Stella smirked. 

“Nope.” 

“See you next shift then.” Stella laughed. 

“Good night, Stella.” Sylvie waved as she walked out the front door. 

“So, did you have fun tonight?” Matt asked. “It’s been a while since you’ve been here.”

“I did.” Sylvie smiled as he opened the passenger door to his truck for her. 

“How’d we get roped into two double dates before we’ve actually gone on a date ourselves?” 

“I don’t know.” Sylvie laughed. 

“How about we go on a real date first?” Matt asked. “Maybe tomorrow night?” 

“Sounds perfect.”    
  


**Author's Note:**

> This whole thing came to be because I'm gonna miss Sharky on Ambulance 61, lol. I had fun writing it and I hope you enjoyed it! 
> 
> Feel free to come find me on twitter or tumblr, @atiredfangirl on both!


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